Rocco B.G. Labbate

Memorial Video


Biography

Rocco Biagio Giovanni Labbate was born on 8/28/1944 in Valledolmo, Sicily to parents Biagia Milone and Francesco Giulio Labbate. The first born to his parents was similarly named Rocco Giovanni Labbate, but died after less than a year of life. Then his sister Maria was born, followed by sister Amalia, then himself Rocco, then sister Gilda. Since Rocco had the same name as a deceased sibling, his family always called him “Gianni” ("Giovanni") instead of his first name "Rocco". The middle name "Giovanni" was the name of Francesco's brother who died in WWI before having any children.

↑ Rocco, Francesco, Gilda, Amalia
← Biagia, Francesco, Amalia, Rocco, Maria

His mother Biagia (Bessie) was a seamstress and his father Francecso was a professor of music (an orchestra conductor). They always kept busy. Idle time was wasted time. The family moved around a lot but always stayed together. Nothing got in the way of family plans. In Sicily, he particularly loved to eat artichoke, scallops and ravioli. He sang at church as an altar boy. He would play the card game Briscola with his father (which is similar to the game of Hearts in the US). A few times, he shadowed his father at work while conducting music. He sometimes got angry with Amalia because she would come into the room where he and Gilda were sleeping early in the morning to use the sewing machine.

On 7/21/1954, Biagia and Maria travel to the United states arriving on 8/2/1954. A year later (and using a single passport) Francesco, Amalia, Rocco and Gilda follow. Originally, Ignazio Scuzzarella (Brother to Rocco's paternal Grandmother, Rocchina Scuzzarella), was to host the family in Boston, but Ignazio died on March 17. On 4/15/1955 they crossed the Atlantic on the luxury ocean liner Andrea Doria (one year before it sank). Rocco was 11 years old. On 4/23/1955, they arrived at Ellis Island and stayed with Biagia's brother, John Milone, in New Jersey. Biagia told her kids not to speak Italian any more. She was already a citizen of the US (born in New Jersey). Her sister, Lucy, convinced her to move to California for job oppotunities. The family moved to 2606 North Del Mar Avenue in South San Gabriel.

In July 1956, Francesco submitted many of his original musical compositions to Bel Canto, a publishing company in Hollywood. Hal Pruden wrote back saying, "This is not a rejection of your music by the Liberace organization based upon its merits, but it returned because of the fact that we have business commitments with music publishing companies and are limited to using their songs." Francesco was unable to find employment in his beloved field of music. Instead, he got a job pressing suits for Louis-Roth Clothing Company.

On 6/19/1958, Rocco graduates from the Garvey School District. The Garvey School District is a K-8 school in Rosemead at 2730 Del Mar Avenue, the same street where Rocco's family lived.

Rocco went to High School in Alhambra, California. Because he didn’t speak good English at the time, he was bullied by other kids who called him “retarded”. He started doing routine physical exercise. His goal was to become physically intimidating and to beat the bullies at their own game. Sometimes he looked to start fights for no reason. He also took up smoking in High School since that’s what all the “tough guys” were doing.

Rocco taught himself to play acoustic guitar and recorded songs on audio cassette.
Can't Help Falling in Love, by Elvis Presley, would be the first dance at his son's wedding.



In 1962, Rocco graduates from Mark Keppel High School. He had been in A Capella Choir for 3 years from 1960 to 1962. In November 1962, he got a job as a Draftsman working for Dutch Holzhauer and Associates in Downey, California. Using drafting tools (pencil, paper and straight edges) he drew precisely scaled grading plans, street plans, sewer plans, tract maps and tracings.

Amalia Labbate meets her future husband, Vince Piscopo, at Rosemead Park. They realized a shared interest in music. Vince sang tenor in the opera style and Amalia played piano. They began practicing music together. Francesco, as a professor of music, helped Vince to improve his skills. The couple performed one of Francesco's songs, "Pupi Bella", together.

On 3/17/1963, when Rocco was 18 years old, his father died from lung cancer due to smoking. Afterward, Biagia moved back to New Jersey (901 Barton Ave in Point Pleasant) to be close to her brother.

In 1964, Rocco meets Kathleen (Cathy) A Sherman at a beach house in California. At the time, she was dating Rocco's best friend. Rocco and Cathy began seeing eachother regularly. They moved to New Jersey planning to get married. After a few days, Cathy changed her mind and moved to Barberton OH where her parents were. In October 1965 Rocco gets a job as an Electrical Draftsman for Porter, O'Brian and Armstrong in Newark NJ. Rocco visited Cathy during his May vacation. They decided that Rocco should get a job in Ohio and plan a wedding once again. Rocco moves in with her at 688 Baird Street in Barberton, Ohio.

On 7/10/1965, despite Rocco's family objecting to it, Cathy and Rocco are married at St. Augustine Church in Barberton, Ohio. They purchase a home under land contract from Harry Davidson (a contractor) at 1606 Idlewood Avenue in Akron, Ohio.

On 2/19/1966, Rocco and Cathy's daughter, Deena Darlene Labbate, was born at Barberton Citizen's Hospital.

In April 1966, Rocco got a job working for Hale and Kulgren and Associates in Tallmadge, OH. Rocco and Cathy would constantly argue about money and distrust, eventually escallating to slapping each other. They separated and Rocco moved into a house at 4776 Bickford Avenue in Akron OH while still making payments on the house. His landlord who lived down the street, Anabel Sackett, described Rocco as "cooperative and dependable". On 1/1/1967 he found a job at National Rubber Machinery (NRM) as a Senior Draftsman. Attempts for Rocco and Cathy to reconcile via consultation with family and with a priest failed.

On 12/11/1967, Cathy files for divorce. Rocco agrees to pay child support and all major medical expenses for Deena. Child support was initially set at $30 twice a month. On 2/15/1973 it was increased to $35. On 9/22/1975 it was increased to $42.50. On 3/1/1978 it was increased to $54.00. The house was sold back to Harry Davidson and Rocco remained renting at Bickford Avenue. Cathy and Deena moved to 405 West Miller Avenue, Appartment F in Akron, Ohio. The marriage would be annuled almost 20 years later.

In late February 1968, Rocco took his pre-induction physical in Cleveland. Within a few days he was served notice that he would be inducted soon if not reclassified. Based on a draft lottery, men would be ordered into pre-induction physical examinations. Then, based on their occupation and mental/physical health they would be assigned a deferment classification. Certain classifications would be involuntarily induced into the armed forces based on demand. Rocco was a non-student, unmarried and healthy so he was assigned "1-A" which was high priority to be drafted.

On 4/1/1968, Rocco left NRM to visit his sisters Maria and Amalia in California, and his mother Biagia and sister Gilda in New Jersey. In June 1968, instead of waiting around to be contacted by Draft Board, he took initiative and enlisted in the United States Marine Corps. He was under the impression that he would earn citizenship in the process. That Christmas he visited his cousins Christine and Rosemary before leaving for boot camp at Camp Lejeune.

On 1/2/1969, Rocco's Mother, Biagia (Bessie Muzzi at the time) sends a letter pleading for PFC (Private First Class) Rocco BG Labbate to be discharged. She explains how she relied on her son to help her financially. It was burdensome to have him gone. She had gotten married in March 1968 hoping to finally relieve Rocco financially, but the marriage ended after only a few months. Biagia was left living in an attic. She described the vicious cycle of needing medicine to work but not being able to afford medicine without work.

Plea from Biagia (1/2/1969)
Dear Sirs,

My name is Bessie Labbate Muzzi, a widow. I'm 51 years old and I am the mother of Pfc. Rocco B.G. Labbate, #2255813, U.S.M.C. Since I cannot write English well, this letter was written at my instigation and with my full knowledge of its contents. My reasson for this plea is to request my son be discharged from the service for the purpose of returning home to assume my support and care.

After the loss of my huband, I have relied on Rocco to supplement my income whenever he could and whenever I was not able to work. In the past year, my health has failed more and more, and I have had to rely on him more and more. In March of last year I married again, thiking I could finally relieve my boy of this burden. After spending months in hell with a man who needed the bottle more than he needed air to breathe, my marriage ended on the rocks: no money, no place to stay, barely the clothes on my back. Rocco eased the pain with his help and his encouragement. He contributed a lot by sending cash to me, when I needed it. To add to my problems, the Army drafted him and in turn he enlisted in the Marine Corps. This, he did after lying about his ulcer, since he was turned down before. I guess this was the straw that broke the camel's back. My nerves are shot; I just can't sleep or live like a human being anymore. I live now in a little attic they tried to make in an appartment and whenever I can work, I bring home $65 a week if I work 40 hours. That hardley pays for my rent and food. Most of the time, I can't pay for the medicine which I need and if I don't take them I feel worse and can't go to work.

Somehow, whenever I feel better, something else goes wrong and then my health gets negelected again. If just once I could get out of this vicious circle.

My youngest daughter, Gilda Mrozek, just got married and had child. Her husband is now a private in the Army and they can barely keep themselves going. My other children live in California and they both have two small children each and a house to look after. Although their husbands are employed, their bills and illnesses have kept them from helping me. Who can I turn to? Why can't I have my son back to take care of me, at least until I can get back on my feet and get my health back? I plead with you to help me. Please, help me.

Respectfully,
Bessi Muzzi

On 1/13/1969, after final training, indoctrination and administrative processing at Camp Pendleton, Rocco departed for duty with the 1st Marine Division. On 1/17/1969 Rocco's sister Maria personally called congressman George E Brown to request that Rocco be discharged on the basis of hardship. He was already deployed overseas but was supposed to still be given an opportunity to submit his own application for discharge. Maria was informed that message traffic to the Far East was very heavy and that administratinve inquiries aren't granted high priority on wire service. On 1/26/1969, Maria sent a letter to the congressman echoing Biagia's plea from earlier that month. Rocco was denied discharge because it was "not an emergency".

Plea from Maria (1/26/1969)
To Whom it May Concern,

I'm the daughter of Bessie Labbate Muzzi, and I am writing to ask you for assistance in my mother's behalf.

My brother, Rocco B.G. Labbate, is now in the Marine Corps stationed in Vietnam and a hardship discharge is now being processed, in order for him to help financially my mother upon return. She has relied on him in the past and especially recently when her marriage went to the rocks and her poor health kept her from working.

Honorable, George E. Brown Jr., Congressman from California, has assisted us in initiating this discharge and I would be forever grateful if you would write to him at your earliest convenience. Contents of the letter should mention of her current situation in regard to the ill fated marriage and financial condition.

Hopefully, you will be able to comply with my request at an early date since this whole mess has got my mother in a more deploring condition, for her failing health.

Thanking you in advance for your interest and assitance, I am grateful for your prompt action.

Respectfully,

Mrs. Maria Provenza
2606 North Del Mar Ave.
Rosemead, Calif. 91770


Starting in January 1969, Rocco served overseas during the Vietnam War in Echo Company, 1st Division, 5th Regiment, 2nd Battalion. During deployment, he was exposed to agent orange and saw many of his friends killed. In April, he contracts malaria and is flown to Da Nang Hospital where he is put on ice to bring his fever down. He was transferred to the Naval Hospital in Yokosuka, Japan due to complications. As he recovered, he was assigned to the Marine Barracks Supply Section for which he received a letter of recognition for excellent performance.

From Captain John S. Barber (5/26/1969)
From: Supply Officer
To: PFC Rocco B.G. Labbate 2255813/0311

Subj: Letter of Recognition

1. Concurrent with your assignment as an out-patient of the U.S. Naval Hospital, Yokosuka, you have been assigned to the Marine Barracks Supply Section to assist this command in the performance of its mission. This letter is to recognize your excellent performance of duty during this assignment.

2. It has been noted that you have had to learn a new field and have done so in an exceptional manner. You have also faithfully reported each day and have worked many hours and performed valuable assistance to the Clothing Unit of the Supply Section.

3. Your personal appearance and millitary bearing, depite the handi-cap of hospitalization, have been an example for your fellow Marines to emulate.

4. You have earned the admiration and respect of those with whom you have served here.

5. I personally add my own appreciation for a job well-done.

John S. Barber
Captain, USMC

From Sergeant Jim Long (6/24/1969)
Rocco

Hi-ya buddy! How are things with you? Just fine I hope. As for me I'm o.k. but this heat is a real bitch. I got back to my same unit but they have moved. I guess it's better where we're at now because the river is right in front of us. So we go swimming every day. Haven't had any action since I've been back, and I really don't want any more. You know what I mean. I'm getting to short for that kinda shit. So what have you been doing? Fucking all them girls I bet.

Have you heard anything on what they're going to do with you? If so let me know. If they send you back here you keep your head down, and stay out of trouble. Ha! Ha! But really Rock take it easy. Well I guess this will be short, so write soon and let me know how you're doing. Tell Larry I said hello, and that I'll write one of these days. Oh yea also tell him I'll send his $55.00 to his home this month. Take care and be good.

Your Buddy Jim

While he recovered, his fire team was wiped out in the war. He was then assigned to another unit. Sometime before October 3, Rocco was promoted to Lance Corporal. For the rest of his life he would suffer from PTSD, insomnia, migranes, and an extreme sensitivity to cracking/popping noises (mysophonia). On 2/19/1970 he was discharged from active duty and went home. His experience gave him a life-long hatred of violence in the world. He empathized greatly with migrant people, especially those driven from their homes by foreign invaders.

From Rosemary (Venturi) (10/6/1969)
Dear Johnny,

This is my last piece of stationery. I've been trying to write you ever since the day you left. I've torn up 6 started letters. Why? Because it's been nothing but chaos here since I returned from Europe.

I've never been so dissatified in all my life. I almost hopped on the next plane to Europe. Instead, I've started a whole new lofe for myself. I quit my job - gave them one month's notice; broke up with Darwin. I'm sort of in limbo now career-wise and socially. But I have some new things lined up. I'm going to try to get a job in fashion. I have prospects of a position at Bullock's as a buyer trainee and a few other interviews organized. I just cannot stand the entertainment industry any longer. It's such a rat race.

Johnny, I'm going to make this letter short for fear of rattling on and on about my problems. But I want you to know that in between all of this, I have been thinking of you and hoping that the time you have left in the service will go by quickly so you can start a new life too.

Aunt Lucy sends her love. My whole family is well, thank God. We all send our affection to you.

I'll write again as soon as things have cleared up a bit for me.

Love,
Rosemary

From Maria (1/29/1970) Dear John,

I got you letter yesterday. Amalia has been living here since Vince has been in Italy. We had to make a "phony" call to Italy telling him Amalia had pains so he could come back. Enzo and Amalia had to take Elena to the hospital last Saturday. It started with the flu and after some anitbiotics she just wanted to sleep and not drink or eat. She dehydrated her body of minerals and vitamins in one week. She is being fed intravenously and is doing better. She can drink and eat pudding without vomiting. The doctors, after 5 days of testing, suspect hepatitis or some liver ailment and she is quarantined; only parents can go but we were all exposed so when they decide we'll see what happens. To top it all, Enzo's father got a heart attack, so you can see in what a spot we're in. Amalia is feeling better because Vince and Anna are here. Enzo has been a lot of comfort to Amalia. The doctor told her the baby is still due the 13th of Feb. We've been having this epidemic flu but seemed to have shaken it away. I hope you are in good health and hope to see you soon.

Will close for now. I didn't want you to worry if we don't write. Will let you know about Elena.

Love,
Maria

P.S. Received your W2 form. Do you want us to hold it until you come?


Close Friends that died in Vietnam
Romaine - Shrapnel and couldn't find vein
Villalobos - Riddled while walking point
Contreras - Shot between the eyes
Phinn - Grenade exploded
Day - Shot in the head
Arnold - Shot through the neck

On 6/22/1970 Rocco returns to work at NRM as a Liaison Engineer. He quits smoking cold-turkey. He committed to a rigorous workout routine, eating 6 raw eggs for breakfasts. He briefly rented a home at 32 Brutus Place Cathy had lived in the same home briefly during the war. in Akron Ohio right next to Summit Lake, one of the 14 Portage Lakes. He had a girlfriend named Jill. He would see his daughter, Deena, every other weekend. She would visit, play with a neighbor's dog named Benji, and walk to the lake. He later moved into a house at 4776 Bickford Avenue in Akron Ohio with two other bachelors.

Songs (Old Memories)
TitleArtistRelease
Sad EyesRobert John
Sad Movies (Make Me Cry)Sue Thompson
The One Who Really Loves YouMary Wells
You'll Lose a Good ThingBarbara Lynn
Angel BabyRosie and The Originals1961
Tell It Like It IsAaron Neville1966
Yes, I'm ReadyBarbara Mason1965
The Line Between Love and HateThe Pretenders1971
SleepwalkSanto and Johnny
Lo Mucho Que Te QueiroRené y René1968
SideshowBlue Magic
Unchained MelodyThe Righteous Brothers
Kiss And Say GoodbyeThe Manhattans
Let's Get It OnMarvin Gaye
La La Means I Love YouThe Delfonics
Baby I'm For RealThe Originals
Hello StrangerBarbara Lewis
Dry Your EyesBrenda and The Tabulations
Oh What A NightThe Dells
Dedicated To The One I LoveThe Shirelles
Laughing BoyMary Wells
You Beat Me To The PunchMary Wells
Darling BabyThe Elgins
MaybeThe Chantels

In July 1970, Sharon and Rocco are set up on a blind date. Rocco still worked at NRM and Sharon worked for Burger Iron, a steel fabricating company. They played cards at a friend’s house and then went out for miniature golf. They would go on many other dates: playing Nerts (the card game), bowling, going to baseball games, etc. Sharon lived with her parents on Dailey Road in Akron, Ohio. Sharon owned a new 1970 Chevy Vega (her first car) and Rocco owned a Pontiac. On 1/29/1973 Rocco buys a 1973 Green Chevy Camaro. Rocco and Sharon would play Mille Bornes and The Game of Life board game with Sharon’s family. Rocco and Sharon were friends with Douglas and Marilyn Steiner. Douglas was a coworker of Rocco at NRM.

On 3/27/1976, Rocco and Sharon are married. They move together into a Duplex at 289 Sagamore Avenue in Akron, Ohio.

Rocco and Sharon were friends with James and Carol Starkey. James was an engineer with Hoover Co. The Starkey's had known eachother since the 1st Grade. They had a son named Jimmy who was autistic. They told Sharon and Rocco a story about a time when they were boating down a river. They noticed a low branch and yelled "Duck!" In response their son, Jimmy, said "Quack!"

On 8/2/1976, Rocco's mother Biagia married Joseph A. Maione in New Jersey.

On 8/2/1977, Rocco's Uncle, Giovanni (John) Milone, died in Columbus Hospital, Newark NJ.

Newspaper: John Milone, of Bloomfield
A Mass for John J Milone, 68, of Bloomfield will be offered at 10:30AM tomorrow in St Francis Xavier Church, Newark, following a funeral from the Megaro Memorial Home, 341 Roseville Ave, Newark.

He died Tuesday in Columbus Hospital, Newark.

Surviving are his wife, Elizabeth, two sons, John B and Richard C; a daughter, Miss Patricia; a sister, Mrs Bessie Gemma, and two grandchildren.

Rocco went to the dentist to get his wisdom teeth removed. He was given general anesthetic and went to sleep. There was the sound of a jackhammer outside from some road work. Rocco woke up and said "Right between the eyes". The sound of the jackhammer became gunfire in a nightmare that took him back to Vietnam when he saw his friend, John Contreras, shot between the eyes.

To whom this may concern (1/7/1978)
We have known Rocco Labbate for about 10 years. He and my sister-in-law met in California and came back to Ohio in 1964 to get married. Rocco lived with us a few months before they were married.

After a September marriage they bought a home in Akron. They were married a little over a year and were divorced. They had a little girl named Deena, who now lives accross the street from us with her mother. Rocco stayed in Akron for a while and decided to join the service. After a stay in boot camp he was sent to Vietnam; it was there he contracted malaria and spent some time in the hospital and was sent home where he was able to get his old job back at National Rubber Machine. He rented a home in Portage Lakes where he now resides.

Alyce Sherman
688 Baird Ave
Barberton, Ohio 44203

On 3/15/1978, Rocco and Sharon signed an Agreement of Sale with Lawrence E Duff and Jacqueline Duff. They agreed to purchase a home from the Duffs at 1156 Ridgefield Drive, Point Pleasant NJ for $29500. They paid $1000 at the time of signing and agreed to apply for a $255000 loan and pay $3000 more before July 1st. The agreement was ultimately voided.

On 3/19/1978, Rocco and Sharon's honeymoon began. They traveled with friends Steve and Jan Keiger. Rocco knew Steve from work. The group flew from Cleveland Ohio to Detriot Michigan, then to Montigo Bay in Jamaica, meals and cocktails prepaid. They traveled with Elliot Tours through the Robert Prentice Travel Bureau for a total of $1012.50. They stood for seven nights at the Jamaica Hilton in Ocho Rios. Activities included lots of restaurants, beach trips, and getting sun-burnt. Steve and Jan commented that "all Rocco wanted to do was eat".

On 8/29/1978, Rocco is promoted to Industrial Manager at NRM. Rocco gave his two week notice saying: "Under the present conditions and present salary I do not feel I can perform my job properly therefore I am working my two weeks notice starting 11-10-78." and left NRM on December 1. The couple lived with Sharon’s parents in Akron for a couple months and then with Bessie in Point Pleasant, New Jersey.

On 6/30/1979, Biagia's husband Joseph Maione dies.

By the end of July 1979, Rocco had a job with Prudential Insurance. Rocco and Sharon became tenants at 230 Chestnut Street Appartment B in Tom's River, New Jersey. Sharon became a manager at Ocean County College.

Deena would write to Rocco and Sharon many times each year. Her letters were artistic and creative, overflowing with affections and wishes that they would visit soon. She would give updates about her life, stressing how much she missed her Dad and the memories she had playing ball and ice-skating. She would tell Rocco he was "the best dad ever" and end her letters with "XOXOXO Infinity."

On 8/14/1981, Deena saw a medical specialist who said "she would benefit by having a water purifier at home" to treat Atopic Eczema. On 8/18/1981, Cathy had a $1500 water purifier installed for Deena. Prudential Insurance refused to pay for the purifier since "water purifiers are not listed among the items considered eligible" expenses. Cathy was upset by the delay in getting the purifier paid for and told Rocco that he, according to her attorney, was liable for the expense. After Deena's condition improved after 4 months, Rocco argued that the purifier should be covered. Prudential again refused since it wasn't "ordered" by a physician (only recommended) and it wasn't "customarily recognized".

In January 1983 Rocco and Sharon bought a new Cape Cod style house at 426 Chestnut Drive in Lanoka Harbor, New Jersey. They got a mortgage through Larson Mortage Company for about $39900 with a yearly interest of 16.75% and a deposit of $2110 on 12/17/1982. The interest rate would increase by 7.5% each year for the first 5 years and they would end up paying over $225000 after 30 years. They had planned the construction for about a year. Rocco and Sharon completed the entire second floor of the house themselves: drywall, electrical and plumbing for two bedrooms and a bathroom.

On 2/19/1984, Deena had her 18th birthday. On May 2nd, Rocco attends a court hearing and motions to terminate child support since Deena was 18 and would graduate high school on June 9th. Termination of child support was not mentioned in the original divorce judgement. There was some confusion because at the time of Rocco's divorce the age of majority in Ohio was 21 years, but the current age of majority was 18 years. On 1/1/1974 (ten years prior) the Ohio Supreme Court lowered the age of majority to 18 years. Rocco's attorney argued that Deena's situation was the same as Pinski versus Pinski (4/9/1982) where it was ruled that when there is no such mention, the current age of majority should be assumed.

On 3/2/1985, Rocco drives Sharon to a surprise baby shower with friends. Sharon didn't know the sex of the baby yet, but she reveals that Rocco liked the name "Amalia" for a girl and "Santino" (Sunny) for a boy. Sharon liked the name "Francesca" for a girl and "Rocco" for a boy, but she didn't really want to give the baby the same name as its father.

Rocco and Sharon’s son, Santino, was born on 4/17/1985 in Point Pleasant, New Jersey. Five months later they sold their house to their neighbors across the street, Philip and Dorothy Biagiotti, on 6/20/1985 and moved to California. They traveled in a Red Ford Econoline. The man they hired to drive their Renault Encore accross the country had to deal with a flat tire along the way. Rocco’s mother and sisters already had separate houses there with their own families. The plan was to work for the family business “Gemaldi” his in-law’s, Enzo Provenza and Vince Piscopo, had established as a food supplier for local Italian restaurants. The business name was an acronym for the children: Gina, Elena, Maria, Anna, Lisa, Diana and "Imports". Enzo found a house and Rocco bought it sight-unseen on 7/8/1985 from Oscar and Sophia Ponce. The home was in the city of Rancho Mirage on the small culdesac of Independence Circle at 70573 Sunny Lane.

For 6 months, Rocco and Sharon survived on credit with no income from the family business. Once when Rocco was working at the Gemaldi office near Perez Road, someone came to the door trying to sell artwork. Even though Rocco was basically broke at the time, he bought three collage style pictures.

Gemaldi failed. Enzo blamed Rocco for spending long hours organizing the warehouse at the expense of other business responsibilities. Rocco renewed his insurance license and went back to Prudential on 12/2/1985. His License Number was 0691531. He had to drive all over the place (as far as Los Angeles) taking exams. In 1989 he got at job at a Farmer's Insurance Group firm and its owner, Pat Legg. He enjoyed playing Tennis and Baseball with coworkers. He was friends with a fellow insurance broker named Tom Balli who worked for Allstate. Tom had a son named Dominick who once borrowed a green motorcycle toy from Santino and never returned it. Rocco shared his extra business cards with Santino who drew pictures on them. Rocco sold insurance to an old friend from High School named Allen D Fosnes who still lived in Alhambra. After he hurt his back trying to move an overhang on the exterior of the house, he experienced permanent sciatic nerve pain.

From Giuseppe to Rocco (2/14/1989)
My dearest nephew Rocco,

I was very pleasant to receive your letter, because we didn't expect it. Thank you very much for your kind thought.

We remember you all the time with big home-sickness. We often look your photos, the only thing we can do, which make us happy.

Here the weater is very strange, very dry. We have seen the skiing competitions of Colorado on the TV and my nephiews would like to be there because here there isn't snow. The country looks like a spring country.

Now say goodbye to your mother, your sisters and your relatives.

Love

Lina and Giuseppe Labbate

P.S. Good Easter to you and all of your relatives.


On 1/8/1990, a deed of trust is made between Rocco and Sharon, Mara Escrow Company and Lawrence Seerman Investments Inc. The agreement was for the Sunny Lane house to be sold to Lawrence and Vera Seerman. The Seerman's deposited $9000 into the escrow account and moved three large household appliances into the house. The Seermans allowed Rocco to withdraw the $9000. On 2/8/1990, the Seermans serve a complaint to the Labbates threatening to sue for the return of the money and appliances. The Labbates never disclosed that the home was in forclosure. The Seermans were no longer interested in buying the house.

In summer 1994, Giovanna Segura (Rocco's cousin, daughter of Giuseppe Labbate and brother of Renato Labbate) and her husband Emanuele Segura visit from Italy.

Letter from Renato to Maria (9/15/1994)
Write by machine to be certain that my words are understood well, because I have a very bad handwriting.

I saw the film taken by Emanuelle; I was left very moved to see practically come alive.

I want to thank you for the welcome that you reserved for Gianna, and I want to complement you on the beautiful house you have.

I want to thank you for the gifts that you sent, but you didn't have to do it.

I wait in Verona the same month as the beautiful exhibition that is called 'Abitano la Casa' are modern furnishings for homes, one strong embrace for your husband.

Salute and thanks also Rocco and his wife; they have a beautiful son that resembles me Michele when he was little.

A nice salute to Amalia and Vincenzo and please offer my thanks.

An embrace to all of your beautiful children which are part of all of us

Hope to see you soon in Verona.

Renato Labbate

Dear Uncle Giuseppe (10/18/1994)
First of all, I would like to apoligize to you for not writing to you after I received your letter. I also want to appoligize for writing this letter in English. I hope you have someone to translate.

I'm not making an excuse, but since me, my wife Sharon and my son Santino moved from New Jersey to California to be closer to my sisters and mother, we have had nothing but difficulties.

We moved to California June 1985 under the impression that me and my brother in laws, Enzo and Vince were going to start a business importing accessories for my sister Maria from Italy and they needed someone to run the business.

We had built a new home in New Jersey and I was doing very well in my insurance business, however we had no reason not to believe all the hot air coming from my brother-in-law Enzo, so we made a huge mistake and moved to California. My mother said that my father made the same mistake when the whole family moved from New Jersey to California in 1956. He also believed his brother-in-law.

I had to start all over in my insurance business and have been trying to keep from going broke ever since.

I could go on for a long time about our ongoing experiences in California, but I don't want to bore you.

I always wonder why we even left Italy in 1955. How things would have been different if we had stayed in Italy. Who knows, maybe my father (your brother) might still be alive. He died when I was 19 years old. At the time, I had a job as a draftsman and wanted to be an architectural engineer.

When I had the chance to see a picture of you, uncle Giuseppe, I see a lot of my Dad in you.

How did my family ever lose contact with your family?

I'm looking at your handwriting from one of your letters and it is a lot like I remember my father's handwriting, very beautiful and unique. I call it very musical. As you know, my father was a music professor in Sicily. What kind of work did you do?

Please write to me as soon as you can. If you don't, I will understand.

Love, Your Nephew
Rocco B.G. Labbate

P.S. It was nice to hear your voice on the telephone and it was also nice to see your daughter Giovanna and son-in-law Emanuele. Say hello to them for me and I am still waiting for Emanuele to fax me a letter.

Dear Rocco (12/25/1994)
I didn't expect your beautiful letter, as it has been very pleasing. Thank you.

Well Rocco, your father and I grew up almost together. The difference of age was four years, infact I was born in 1903 and your father in 1907. Perhaps this was the reason we loved each other a lot.

Giulio had excellent musical endowments until he was very young, infact when he served in the army he conducted the musical corps of Regiments d'istanze of North-Italy. In the mean time, I enlisted in Policy and worked in customs of many towns.

We always wrote letters each other so when he finished to serve the army we met to talk about his future. It was decided to continue his musical studies at the conservetoire "V Bellini" in Palermo.

The other brothers were married, only Giulio and I had unmarried into the family. We spoke with imminent teacher of the conservetoire who had to help him to get the diploma. They said that he had certainly got it in 3 years. So I payed the taxes at the semitery every month.

In 1933 he got the longed for dimploma that offered the possibility to find a job. Infact first he worked in Bisacquino as emfleyce and teacher of the musical corps of the town.

Well this is a little part of the story.
In 1936 there was the war against Ethiopia and then the other terrible war of 1940-45. During that that 30 millions of people died and the people phy of Europe changed. In those years we lost sight of each other.

Some time later someone told me that your parents had gone to North America and that your sister Maria had married one Provenza of Cefalù (a town in Sicily). I wasn't able to accept that I had lost my brother Giulio, so before turning to American Governor to have news about Giulio, I tried to phone to all Provenza in Cefalù (about 30), me lucky!!! I found Enzo Provenza, cousin of your brother-in-law Enzo, and Enzo gave me the exact adress.

I have settled in Verona where all my family lives.

Now I explain to you how was our family: my father, my mother and six sons: Carmelo 1880, Ignazio 1883, Giovanni 1896, Luigi 1899, Giuseppe 1903, Giulio 1906 or 1907. I think that your father settled in America, because I didn't know the language. I wouldn't have rished expetially with my family. Giulio is our hero far away.

Have a nice holiday with your family and write me soon.

Love
Lina and your uncle
Giuseppe Labbate

On 2/3/1995, Renato Labbate (Rocco's cousin who lived in Verona) contacted Rocco about a business proposal. Renato represented an Italian agency named Pioneer that produced a videodisc reader used by Italian schools. Pioneer wanted to buy videodiscs from an American company named Optical Disc LTD, but was unable to do so directly due to international restrictions. Renato wondered whether Rocco would like to become a private middle-man for the export. Rocco expressed interest but on 6/5/1995 Renato informed Rocco that Optical Disc was not allowed to sell their products, even to a middle-man, with knowledge that they would be exported. The business idea between Renato and Rocco never came to life.

In April 1995, Maria Provenza travels to Milan in Italy for a trade exhibition.

The family tried to refinance their mortgage but were denied due to bad credit. Eventually it was no longer feasable to continue living at the Sunny Lane house.

On 4/15/1997, the family moved down the street to a smaller house at 70120 Chappel Road. In 1999 Rocco became a Long Term Care insurance agent for Blue Cross. This meant he was now independent and had to be covered by Errors and Omissions insurance. On 2/16/1999 he took the final exam for a California Long Term Care Laws and Regulations class. He passed with an 88 out of 100. Rocco and Sharon's next-door neighbor was Maghie Don Grenier. She was born in Lebanon on 9/9/1960 and now lived with her kids at 70130 Chappel Road. Rocco helped her get life insurance and Medi-Cal coverage. Sharon knew a Doctor Vuthoori from work who had a 3-bed 2-bath house for rent on Vista Chino where Maghie ended up moving in. Rocco would play console games with Santino, their favorite being Streets of Rage 3. In this game, there is a boxing kangaroo named "Roo". Rocco would call this character a "rabbit", which birthed a long-lasting inside joke between Santino and Rocco of calling every animal a "rabbit" regardless of whether that animal actually resembled one or not. Rocco's favorite character was "Shiva". According to Rocco, Shiva had more realistic looking moves. He liked the character "Fei Long" in Street Fighter 2 for the same reason. Rocco loved the character "Maronie" from the movie Johnny Dangerously. Roman Maronie was a gangster mob-boss who constantly mispronounced curse words. Maronie's Speech. Rocco found this very relatable since many migrant people (kids especially) learn a lot of curse words before they can pronounce them very well.

Looking forward to seeing you (6/25/1997)
My dearest cousins,

Thank you very much indeed for your care: we'll really, really happy to stay with you, in Palms Spring.

I'm glad to heaar that both Enzo and Maria will wake two days off of work to spend time together, but I wouldn't create you problems and difficulties.

Unfortunately, it's impossible for us to decide now what we would like to do in these days, if going to Las Vegas or Grand Canyon. It's really difficult of course doing everything is impossible.

Do you think it'll be easy to find a light flight over Grand Canyon? It could be a nice, fast and (hope) cheaper solution: we could go to Las Vegas and fly over Grand Canyon!!!

You have to decide in complete freedom, then our program will be changed in order to accord with yours. We are on holidays!!!

Looking forward to seeing you.

A big hug,

Renato

On 7/11/1997, Renato, Mariagrazia and Annachiara Labbate arrive in San Francisco on vacation from Italy. On 7/22/1997 they arrive in the Palm Springs area. They visited Rocco's family at the Chappel house in Rancho Mirage and Biagia at her home on Dinah Shore.

Holy Christmas (12/21/1997)
Dear Rocco, Sharon and Santino,

We would like to give you our best wishes of Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. The time spent together last summer was wonderful: we think everybody should have the possibility to meet friends and relatives, as far as they live!

We're always thinking 'bout you: we'd thank you for everything!

Time ago we sent you a postal pack with Italian-English dictionary in, for Sharon. We fear you've never received it because we've not had notice of this. Please inform us 'bout the pack.

We'll really happy if you keep in touch with us. We'll never forget you, your kindness and joy.
A big hug and all our best wishes.

Renato - Grazia
Annachiara - Michele

In April 1998, Gilda and her son Richard wanted to travel to Italy but had a lot of trouble getting a Visa for Gilda due to her not being a citizen. Rocco watched an episode of CSPAN where a guest said there were only two ways to become a citizen: marriage or naturalization. On 12/8/1998, Rocco wrote a letter to his congressman, Mary Bono, asking if he was lied to by the recruiter back in 1968. He asked if he served in the Vietnam war as an Italian mercenary carrying the united states flag. Mary Bono's office kept Rocco updated on the status of his inquiry via letters. Ultimately the answer was yes. He was not a citizen; he had indeed been lied to.

Dear Family in Italy, love Gilda (1999)
I would've liked to have written to all of you in Italian, but I'm afraid it would have taken me another forty years to figure out how to write in Italian.

I'm hoping that your children will be able to interpret this letter to you. First of all I want you to know that I wish I could've returned with my son this time around, but hopefully in the next few years I will return. I wanted to thank all of you again for the best birthday last year: my 50th birthday that I spent with you in Italy. Now that time has past, it seems like it was only a dream. It was so special. I met my dear uncle Giuseppe and aunt Lina. Uncle remined me so much of my father, Giulio, that it was almost like being with my dear father once again. I know that my son, Ricardo, felt that he was meeting his grandfather, Giulio, for the very first time.

You'll never know how much that trip meant to myself and my son.
All of you treated us both like family. Loving family.

After we left Rome, we flew into Palermo, Sicily. We drove through Sicily, looking for the town I was born, Ciancianna. We never did find that town, but after visiting with Maria in Caltanisetta, we were able to find Villa Rosa. That's where all of my childhood memories were from, not the town I was born in.

My son and I were able to see those memories that I often spoke about since my son was a child. It was an amazing experience to see the house I lived in, the school that I attended, the corner store that my father and I would walk to to buy cigarettes and then actually meeting the owner's son who remembered my father and I going into that store while he helped his parents in 1955. I also got to see the covenant and church that I often visited. I truly feel that my dear father's soul guided my son and I, and that his sould was with us in Villa Rosa.

Thank you for being so wonderful to my son and I.
Love to all of you,
Gilda

In 2000, the family moved to a house with similar floor-plan at 37520 Chappel Road at the corner of Da Vall. Rocco gave his entire life to his son, Santino. Without even being asked he would upgrade the computer, backup files, print out game hints and fix hardward/software issues. He would always support Santino’s passions. He learned how to fix all manner of household appliances and gadgets; only hiring out as a last resort. He accumulating decades of tools, hardware and paper records. He saved instruction manuals for every item he ever owned including their purchase reciepts. He had a binder dedicated to holding buisness cards from people he met over the years. He saved vinyl records, casettes and VHS tapes. He saved all of his insurance license renewals and continuing education documents. He saved tax returns, medical records and all accompanying notes. He saved fragments of all sorts of broken items: transistors, light bulbs, screws, lids, etc.

In 2003, Victor Villalobos, the brother of Arthur Garcia Villalobos who was killed during the Vietnam War, reaches out on a web site to anyone who served with his brother in Echo Company, 1st Division, 5th Regiment, 2nd Battalion. Rocco recognized that he served with Arthur in An Hoa, so he responds to Victor.

A reply to Arthur Villalobos' Brother
Victor: I'm sorry, I can't say that I remember that name. I have tried to forget a lot of things for many years. I have forgotten a lot of names, except ones that were close to me. Some things you can't forget. I mostly stayed with my fire team which was your brother and John Contreras. This was from the first of Jan 1969 to first part of May 1969. The fire teams stayed very close since we had to work well together.

My first operation when I joined your brother was a company sweep up a mountain searching for the enemy. Our operations were always to engage the enemy and destroy. Most of the time it was platoon size, squad size or even smaller size operations. The three platoons split up at the base of the mountain. I happened to be point man for our platoon up the mountain. It seemed to me like the new guy was either point or tail end Charlie. I remember that one of the other two platoons had a point dog [a German Shepherd]. Anyways, I was point, your brother Arthur behind me and John Contreras behind him. When we got to the top of the mountain, we happened to spot what looked like a recon enemy group down below coming right up the trail on the other side of the mountain. We immediately set up L shape around the trail in an ambush position. The three of us were on the small end of the L at the far side of the mountain top.

I remember thinking, this can't be, two days in country. It's like the movies, too easy. We waited frozen for what seemed like an eternity for the enemy to come up the trail, when all of the sudden all hell broke loose to the right of us. We, of course, hit the ground. I don't know how we were not hit by all that fire power, however, I remembered hearing and seeing the rounds hitting vegetation around us. Anyway, not knowing how this could have happened, we had no choice but to hold our position.

When all the shooting stopped and all the yelling and screming started, we found out that the platoon that had the point dog, somehow [not good communication between platoons I guess], came up the trail behind us, close enough to our ambush position where the dog must have signaled in his own way that there were enemy hidden, and the platoon opened up on us by mistake.

Arthur was always in great spirits even thoigh he had already been wounded, I believe in the stomach, a few months before Jan 2, 1969 when I got there.

I have never told anyone any of my Vietnam experiences for many reasons including, not being understood. Not even my wife or son; maybe someday, however, you and your family made the ultimate sacrifice and I think you understand.

You may want to ask Walter Allen if he remembers this incident. This might tell us when he got there. It sounds to me that he was at the May fire fight with Arthur.

In October 2003, Rocco brokered a deal between Calvary Chapel of Palm Springs "The Bridge" and Anthem Blue Cross that allowed the chapel to offer medical, dental and life insurance to all of their employees through a small group proposal. As a mediator, Rocco helped the chapel add new employees to the plan. Rocco corresponded with Richard Raher, the founder/CEO. He helped them adjust to changes in coverage caused by the 2010 Affordable Care Act. He also helped with requests to reduce the wait period for new hires.

On 4/27/2005, Rocco writes to Toyota Customer Assistance complaining about some premature repairs that were needed on the 1998 Toyota Camry. The water pump, timing belt and driver side window all needed to be replaced and Rocco felt that Toyota should pay for it. Prior to the window being replaced, a thief had tried to steal the CD player through the partially closed window. Rocco used Sharon's name on the letter.
In August 2005, Gilda's enrollment in health insurance was declined by Blue Cross due to preexisting conditions. Rocco tried to get her and her husband insured through a small group proposal, which would cover them as employees of their own business. Gilda worked for a cable station and later ran her own business, Agrispec Technical Clothing, from her home at 10303 Sheep Creek Road in Phelan, California. Years before, in 1990, Gilda typed a letter to Biagia about trying to quit smoking.

Letter to Biagia from Gilda (1990)
Dear Mom,

I know you wait for mail every day, so I decided to write to you so you'll receive mail.

How are you? Fine I hope.

Today is the 9th day that I don't smoke. It's real hard but I'm not going to smoke. I've been chewing so much sugarless gum since I stopped that I bit my cheek on my left side. Now I can't chew gum for a few days until it heals. So I'm eating peanuts, candy, everything that is small and I can pick on all day long.

Oh well, I guess that's better than smoking!

Once in a while I feel like hittinh something or screaming but that's a normal reaction when you quit smoking after 20 years!!!!!

I'll let you know what day we're coming out - it'll probably be Friday, July 2nd. This Sunday we have to go to his parents' for father's day, and in the meantime we'll see what's going on with the house.

Grandpa is going to San Diego this weekend for a few days. I guess he'll stay at his father's house. It's good for him to go for a few days.

That's all the baloney for now. I'll talk to you this weekend.

TAKE CARE,

MRS. JILL ROBISON

On 3/12/2006, Rocco's sister Maria died fighting cancer at the age of 65.

Only 6 months later on 10/5/2006, his sister Gilda died of lung cancer. Gilda's husband, Tim, left on very bad terms with Gilda's sons, Richard and George. Gilda wanted to be cremated and have the ashes brought to a hiking trail that she liked. Tim wanted to video tape this event during the first snow that December (an unknown time). This added complexity and made it difficult to accomodate work schedules. Gilda also didn't want a funeral service, but Tim held one anyways. Gilda's wishes and those of her sons, Richard and George, were treated as unimportant.

Automobiles Owned
Year Make ModelVinLicDate
1982 Ford Econoline-1988
1979 Chrysler LebaronFP41J9G1266811988-1990
1984 Renault Encore1XMDC9337EK1910401984-1993-
1987 Lincoln Continental2LMK415-2002-
1998 Toyota Camry7TLS728-2003-
2005 Mazda 3-2008
2006 Lincoln Zephyr3LNHM26166R6649255VYZ3112006-
2006 Toyota 4RunnerJTEZU14R5600836035WJR2012006-2021
2021 Toyota Highlander5TDZZRAH3MS0504168WFN3332021-

In 2008, Rocco wrote many of his favorite songs onto 7 audio CDs. Some of them were recorded from his own vinyl record collection using a microphone.

Rocco's Favorite Songs
TitleArtistRelease
ImagineJohn Lennon1971
Isn't She LovelyStevie Wonder1976
Evil WaysSantana1969
LongerDan Fogelberg1979
I’ll Have to Say I Love You in a SongJim Croce1973
Ninety-Nine and a Half (Won’t Do)The Trammps1976
Super FreakRick James1981
You Dropped A Bomb On MeThe Gap Band1982
She's a Bad Mama JamaCarl Carlton1981
Since I Don’t Have YouThe Skyliners1959
Light My FireThe Doors1967
96 TearsQuestion Mark and the Mysterians1966
So into YouAtlanta Rhythm Section1976
Baby Come BackPlayer1977
Back in Love AgainL.T.D.1977
Black Magic WomanSantana1970
RaptureBlondie1980
Riders on the StormThe Doors1971
IfBread1971
Can't Smile Without YouBarry Manilow1978
Careless WhisperGeorge Michael1984
Green RiverCreedence Clearwater Revival1969
I Heard It Through The GrapevineCreedence Clearwater Revival1970
Le FreakChic1978
BeginningsChicago1969
I'm a ManChicago1970
CocaineEric Clapton1977
Run Through the JungleCreedence Clearwater Revival1970
Suzie QCreedence Clearwater Revival1968
Crying in the ChapelElvis Presley1960
Crystal Blue PersuasionTommy James & the Shondells1968
If You Leave Me NowChicago1977
Born on the BayouCreedence Clearwater Revival1969
Mustang SallyCreedence Clearwater Revival???
Easy to Be HardThree Dog Night1969
Mama Told Me (Not to Come)Three Dog Night1970
One Is The LoneliestThree Dog Night1968
These EyesThe Guess Who1969
I Can’t Go for That (No Can Do)Daryl Hall & John Oates1981
Devil or AngelBobby Vee1960
DonnaRitchie Valens1958
I Can’t Tell You WhyEagles1979
Fools Rush InElvis Presley1972
All By MyselfEric Carmen1975
What Are You Doing The Rest Of Your Life??????
FireOhio Players1974
For What It's WorthBuffalo Springfield1966
Love Theme from The GodfatherNino Rota1972
Good Morning StarshineOliver1969
The Heat Is OnGlenn Frey1984
Everybody's Talkin'Harry Nilsson1968
Devil With The Blue DressMitch Ryder1967
Need You TonightINXS1987
Oh GirlThe Chi-Lites1972
On And OnStephen Bishop1976
On My OwnPatti LaBelle1986
Do You RememberPhil Collins1990
Pump up the VolumeMARRS1987
ReunitedPeaches & Herb1978
Give It to Me BabyRick James1981
Have I Told You Lately That I Love YouRod Stewart1991
Nothing Can Come Between UsSade1988
SunriseSimply Red2003
SpookyAtlanta Rhythm Section1972
Fields of GoldSting1993
Summertime BluesEddie Cochran1958
Everybody Wants to Rule the WorldTears for Fears1985
The I-95 Asshole SongAugust Campbell1988
Then You Can Tell Me GoodbyeThe Casinos1967
He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My BrotherThe Hollies1969
The One You LoveGlenn Frey1982
Miss YouThe Rolling Stones1978
This I SwearThe Skyliners1959
Till There Was YouThe Beatles1963
True Love WaysBuddy Holly and The Crickets1956
We Are FamilySister Sledge1979
You Belong To MePatti Page1952
ApologizeTimbaland and One Republic2007
At LastEtta James1960
Does Anybody Really Know What Time It Is?Chicago1969
In My HouseMary Jane Girls1985
I WishStevie Wonder1976
Hello StrangerBarbara Lewis1961
Hold On I'm ComingSam and Dave1966
Holding Back the YearsSimply Red1985
Hopelessly Devoted To YouOlivia Newton-John1978
TrueSpandau Ballet1983
That Lady, Parts 1 & 2The Isley Brothers1973
What Have You Done For Me LatelyJanet Jackson1986
Ladies NightKool and The Gang1979
Uncle Albert / Admiral HalseyLinda McCartney and Paul McCartney1971
Long Cool Woman (In a Black Dress)The Hollies1971
Lotta LoveNicolette Larson1978
What a Wonderful WorldLouis Armstrong1967

On 6/6/2008, Rocco successfully enrolls in VA Healthcare. Despite reporting his exposure to Agent Orange during the war, he was assigned to priority group was 6, which is the lowest priority for healthcare with his household income. At the time, Sharon made $34000 and Rocco made $20000 plus $12000 in other benefits each year. Medical expenses (including health insurance) were $15000 a year. He never ends up using VA Healthcare.

Rocco's mother, Biagia, lived in a senior community in Cathedral City at 68680 Dinah Shore Drive, Apartment 30B. She went on walks every day and enjoyed cooking. After moving in with her daughter Amalia, she stops doing her daily walks.

After Rocco's 65th Birthday in 2009 he was covered under Medicare. On 1/4/2010, Rocco got the lens in one of his eyes replaced by Doctor Pieramici at the Milauskas Eye Institute. The other lens was replaced on 1/25/2010. Rocco was near sighted his whole life but chose for his new implanted lenses to allow far sight. He would need reading glasses following the surgery. On 3/2/2010, Doctor Carlos A Lopez became Rocco's primary care physician. He was continuously prescribed Quinapril, Amlodipine to treat hypertension (high blood pressure). Doctor Lopez even tried to treat Rocco's sciatic nerve pain. Rocco was later prescribed Pravastatin for high cholesterol.

In 2010, Biagia was dagnosed with colon cancer. After getting surgery she moved in with Rocco and Sharon at 37520 Da Vall Drive. The DMV issues her a Disabled Person Placard on 3/23/2011. Biagia loved to play Keno and penny slots at the Agua Cliente Casino. She and Sharon would go once a week and Biagia would spend around $100 a week from her social security benefits. During this time, even though many of Biagia's relatives lived nearby, they seldom came to visit. Biagia signs a DNR form on 11/1/2011.

Biagia died at home on 1/16/2012. Rocco was upset about how others seemed to neglect his mother near the end. Rocco distanced himself from his sisters’ families with the exception of his nephew, Richard. He became increasingly reclusive over time, losing interest in socializing or even leaving the house. Sharon felt guilty for wanting to go out of the house and maintain a social life since Rocco would be left at home.

Rocco built his own home security system. While the camera feed was on one monitor, he would watch world news on the other. Rocco gravitated toward news stories that involved corruption in government, particularly when the United States was involved. He absolutely hated violence. He hated lying politicians. Of particular note were the wars in the middle east. He wanted to buy a deck of playing cards called "The Bush Regime" created by Thierry Meyssan (originally in French) that showcased the crimes and corruption of various politicians following the 9/11 attacks. He was critical of anyone who sympathized with the United States.

His son, Santino, after completing a master’s degree in physics, moved with his High School girlfriend, Ashley Holcomb, to the city of Redlands which was thirty minutes from where Rocco and Sharon still lived in Rancho Mirage, California. Rocco and Sharon were looking to move closer to Santino and Ashley. They applied for financing and made an offer of $218900 on a house at 1012 Church Street in Redlands, but after seeing the work that would need to be done they pulled out. Santino was married to Ashley on 5/25/2014. The wedding ceremony was in Barstow, California on the property of Ashley's grandparents. Rocco and Sharon helped Ashley and Santino clean and prepare the property for this event. They cleaned years of weed growth and even repainted the house exterior. Rocco and Sharon would frequently visit Santino on weekends, especially after the birth of Santino’s first daughter, Willow, on 1/30/2016.

When Santino’s family bought and moved into a home in Banning on 3/30/2019, Rocco took great interest in helping his son with home improvement projects: yard work, sprinklers, duct work, electrical upgrades, appliance repairs and installing security cameras. He never went shopping at stores, but he would place online orders for hardware, tools and equipment for their projects the moment they were mentioned. He would repurpose his wealth of accumulated hardware into whatever was needed on a given day. He was a reliable source of wisdom on all of life’s challenges.

In September 2021, Rocco was forced to server his relationship with Doctor Carlos Lopez. Internal Medicine Specialists, the Medical Group Practice of which Doctor Lopez was founder, terminated their contract with Empire Physicians Medical Group (EPMG). EPMG had managed Rocco's health plan. Rocco had to switch to a new primary care physician, Doctor Ghaleb Sabbah, which made him very angry. He never saw his new doctor. When Doctor Lopez started acceping Rocco's insurance again, he reached out but the bridge was burned.

Shortly after Santino’s second daughter, Ellowyn, was born on 12/23/2023, Rocco was diagnosed with kidney failure. He had an unbreakable distrust in the US medical system that led to him resisting medical advice: not taking medication, not making appointments, etc. He believed he had complete control over his body, knowing better than anyone else whether something was wrong. He refused medical advice to go on dialysis. His heart stopped on the night of 6/16/2024, Father’s Day, after getting home from a visit with his son’s family.

Notes from Santino

I try to imagine the pain my Dad somehow endured. After losing his father he went through a divorce, boot camp, war, agent orange, friends being killed, civilians being killed, catching malaria, survivor's guilt and post traumatic stress. He almost died so many times. You hear stories of soldiers under similar circumstances who commit suicide or who live out their lives in the wilderness because they can't return to society. But Dad came back. He came back because of Deena, his mother and sisters.

Even still, he lived in pain, physically and mentally. He lived with traumatic memories. He lived with debilitating head-aches and back pain. Especially later in life, he lived in a state of isolation and paranoia. Whenever I worried he would say, "Don't worry kid. I know my body.", "I know better than the doctors.", "If something was wrong, I'd tell you, kid.", "I beat malaria. I don't get sick any more." I believed that he was "nearly" invincible, but that I could love him enough to fill all the cracks in his armor.

Dad was tough. It was obvious to everyone that he was. He was also extremely kind. He always assumed the best in everyone when he first met them. He would have his guard down and be overly trusting at some times, but then have his guard up and be overly paranoid at other times. When he felt wronged by someone the feeling lasted forever. I think he learned this about himself which is why he became so reclusive. While he may have avoided people at a small scale, he cared deeply about people at a large scale. This is evidenced by his extremely strong sense of justice and interest in politics.

Dad would get excited about every little accomplishment of mine. He loved watching me play video games. He called me "Professore Labbate" even though I never got a doctorate. He called me "Maestro Labbate" even though I couldn't read music and only ever played the white keys. He called me "Chef Santino" even though I only cooked two things. If I changed a lightbulb he would say "Good job, kid". He thought I was 6'1" but I'm really 5'11". His complements, even though I may have rolled my eyes, were a huge motivation for me to get up each morning and try to be a normal person. He always had supportive ideas and would never give up. He was where my confidence came from.

Even as he lost his mother, his sister Jill and his sister Maria, he still listened to all my dumb kid problems. Even with his back pain and high blood pressure he would carry things for me so I wouldn't get hurt. Even at 79 he would turn tight screws that I was too weak or frustrated to turn myself. I could wake up after midnight and he would still be online ready to chat with me since he couldn't sleep. There were probably many nights he stood up waiting for me and I never came.

The day before Father's Day, Dad couldn't sleep. He also hadn't eaten all day due to an "anxious" stomach. He sat on our couch hanging his head exhausted. I sat with him for a while, trying not to act worried. I said I'd cook shrimp at midnight but he didn't laugh and just said, "no." Eventually he convinced me to go to bed and get some sleep. He never wanted anyone to worry. His biggest concern about going to the hospital was that my Mom would be home alone. He hadn't given up; he didn't want to die. He thought this illness was a phase just like all the others. His back would flare up but a month later he would be helping me cut down tree branches. He would lose his appetite but then eat a bunch of pasta and meatballs the next day. He would act really tired but then get all his energy back and play with Willow. I wish we hadn't ignored it this time. His whole life was one sacrifice after another for his family, and this was just one more. He would rather suffer alone than inflict the slightest worry on anyone else.

He had a very high level of focus, learning fine details about subjects of interest. He kept receipts and user manuals for everything he ever owned. He wrote notes on every bill and insurance claim. He kept records of things he looked up on the internet and conversations he had with people. Everything was a token of remembrance. When writing this biography, right when I hit a dead end I would stumble onto a file he saved with everything I need to know. He may not have kept a traditional journal but his collections told a story. Precious details would have been lost without them.

Sifting through his life has revealed a sad story. He longed to be with his lost family members. He wished he had never left New Jersey or even Italy. He wanted to own a house but never did. He wanted to become a citizen but was betrayed at every turn. I wish I could go back in time and hug him. I wish I would have taken better care of Francesco and Biagia's precious son. Instead, for the sake of space I'm sitting here filtering the legacy of a better man. I'm destroying the journal of someone who dedicated his life to me. I don't think very many people understand that; they just see it all as budensome junk.

I wish I didn't have to discard anything. I'm glad he had so much stuff because at least now it feels like I get to spend a little more time with him. Our brains worked in similar ways. Now more than ever I'm glad for every little bit that I resemble him. I can't get rid of anything either.

I will never say goodbye.